She's not infallible. But the less emotionally involved she is with a person, the better a judge she becomes.
So...watching politicians on TV with Rhumba is fun. And sometimes a little scary.
Sunday night we watched President Obama give a long interview on the "60 Minutes" TV news magazine. I have not been in love with the gentleman; there are villains in our society, and he has seemed unwilling to confront them, or even to declare them as such.
And as I watched him on television I found that sometimes I found him entirely insincere. At other times, I trusted everything he said and claimed to feel. But I couldn't say why. I asked Rhumba what she thought.
"When he's trying to sell something, he adopts a straight-on stare to seem sincere," she said. "But it doesn't look right. And he holds his head completely still."
"When he's really sincere, his head moves around while he's speaking.
"I don't think he's actually lying," she said. "But he's saying things he doesn't completely believe."
"You mean, like talking points?"
"Yes." She thought a bit. "He's trying to be a good person. Otherwise he wouldn't be so easy to read. He wouldn't let his thoughts get so close to the surface. It's not like that guy -- Boner?"
"Boehner," I supplied. Pronounced Bay-Nor. The Republican Speaker of the House of Representatives. ""But people call him that."
"He's hidden his feelings so deep I can't read them at all," she said. "He's drunk a lot, too."
We were eating dinner in front of the television. The interview went on, and Obama cycled between back and forth sincerity and spin. And occasionally, when he didn't like the interviewer's question, he responded with barely-controlled irritation.
"He can be a prick when he wants to be," I observed.
"He needs a room of his own," Rhumba said. "Some place where he can go off by himself, and scream."
We'd been eating cheese, and the cats began to paw at the debris. So I took the dishes to the kitchen and put them in the sink.
I heard a strangled cry from the living room.
"What is it?!" I rushed in.
While I was gone, Obama had made a statement; and then made a face.
This was the statement he'd made: The one thing I've prided myself on before I was President -- and it turns out that continues to be true as President -- I'm a persistent son of a gun. I just stay at it. And I'm just gonna keep on staying at it, as long as I'm in this office. And we're gonna get it right. And America will succeed. I am absolutely confident about that.
And he made the oddest face: almost a smirk. A lawyer's smile. We replayed the sequence a couple of times on the Internet, and I took a screen shoot.
It was his eyes that startled Rhumba. Take a look at them. Is he really "absolutely confident about that?"
Or is there something he's not telling us?
Hey, who took my tinfoil hat?
6 comments:
Love the post! Rhumba's right on with her ability to read people. You'll find that skill more common with women than men. We're simply more intuitive.
Loved that she called him Boner! Still laughing about that. Never thought of it myself. I'm curious what makes her thinks he drinks a lot. The plastic tan? Covering up some tell-tale something or other?
And she's right on about the prez too, I think.
It must be great fun to watch TV with Rhumba. You're sure a lucky guy, Boomer.
If you hear from Forrest, tell him "hey" from me, would you?
Oh ... and ask Rhumba what it means that the "secret word" to be able to comment was my last name when married to Hunband #1.
Boomer,
As a retail used book seller and as a poker player, I have reason to lie a lot. As a poker player, I try to win poker hands by displaying pretty much the same face and demeanor whether I have a good hand or not. I'm trying to win and consistently showing the same facial expression and taking the same amount of time to "decide" how to play the hand makes it harder to read me.
As a bookseller and retailer, I have to "lie" (if you will) to my customers but I hope and believe my lies are basically benign. When I turn down books that someone wants to sell me, I try not to make the customer feel bad, even if I don't like the books they are offering. It's boorish to needlessly insult one's customers, and it can come back to haunt you.
I also have to "lie" about my potential interest in books that my customers want me to read. But again, I think it's a lie that is more in the realm of diplomacy than guile. And I always try to keep in mind the axiom that it's better to keep one's lies as close to the truth as possible; and no gratuitous lying.
When I purchase books, I try to educate my customers a little bit. For one thing, I have plenty of books, so I can honestly say I'm not especially needing more books right now. If my offer for a particular batch of books seems low and less than exciting to my customer, I cheerfully recommend other places where they could possibly sell them or at least donate them to charity. In this instance, it is a liberating feeling to be able to tell the unvarnished truth. And one thing I can sincerely tell my customers is that very few booksellers get rich from selling books; that includes me.
LOS: She's guessing, but she thinks he was your sweetheart, the one you fell for like a lead balloon. Maybe you couldn't live together, but that doesn't change it.
Not that Hub #2 isn't wondrous, but you weren't necessarily in a golden haze when you chose him. Just a guess.
LK: thanks for the thoughtful answer; that should be a blog post in itself. Obama may think he's spinning for our own good. And he may be right, or wrong. But you can cheerful encourage your customers to disagree with you, and he has to sell his line as truth. I think that Rhumba's reaction -- and mine -- was that the last expression completely broke mood with what he'd expressing before -- while trying to make what was arguably supposed to be an inspiring and reassuring statement.
You are probably a better poker player than Obama. Knowing your long background in gaming, actually, I wouldn't doubt it. And frankly the kind of "lying" your doing is in most ways social -- along the lines of answering "No, honey" when wife asks "Does this X make my Y look Z?" It's societal oil, and I would use it myself. In fact, I do.
Obama needs us to believe that it'll all be okay; and it's important that we do, to stay together as a country. But his "tell", to us anyway, made us doubt that he was sure himself.
Holy shazam, Boomer. Tell Rhumba she's got some pretty magical powers. I'm adding her to my list of must-meet people the next time I come down to the Bay Area. Genuine wise women are hard to find. You take good care of that one! And tell her she's right on ... but let's not tell anyone.
LOS:
A lot of people have Rhumba on their must-meet list, as she founded and runs a well-known spiritual website that shall remain nameless.
But her point of view is that they are usually disappointed; because they expect to meet a kindly, spiritual aesthete with a pot of tea. And what they actually find is a surly overweight nerd -- one of good will, to be sure, but not all that good at social conversation.
If you in fact are surly and unconventional, the kind of person that "polite" people only want to speak to for so long, you two might hit it off. But be advised :-)
OMG! Boomer, I'm still laughing. Just now read your latest comment about the wise woman with whom you reside.
What a marketing coup that is to refer to a "well known spiritual website that shall remain nameless." I'm going to have to remember that for one of my future endeavors. The powerful lure of the secret.
I'm sure Rhumba and I will hit it off just great. And if she doesn't like me, she can either turn me into a toad or banish me from the premises.
Since I've been part of facebook's reconnecting with people from your past -- I've gotten a surprisingly hefty dose of: "Go away. We didn't like you when you went to school here 50+ years ago, and we like you even less now!"
So, while I am a sensitive and emotional person (Moon Child and all), I've been toughened up by reconnecting with many of my old "friends" from a half a century ago.
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