I'm going to stop explaining why I do this: make haiku out of short "police blotter"/police log stories from small local papers across the country. For the zen of it; leave it at that. Or refer back to the first batch of police blotter haiku.
Some of these haiku come with the original story, some don't. As always: enjoy.
He died -- but first he
parked his car in town -- somewhere.
His widow searches.
7/26/10 11:25 a.m. A widow is searching for the car her late husband left parked somewhere in town.
Nothing's missing, but
the burglar made breakfast and
didn’t wash dishes.
Two identical Jeeps.
With keys that fit either one.
Confusion ensued.
A woman reported that her purple Jeep Rubicon was stolen from Valley Boulevard sometime before 3 p.m. It had been mistakenly driven away by someone who owns an identical vehicle vehicle — the keys fit.
Died tragically:
Drove a golf cart off a cliff.
(Snicker) We all grieve.
Two a.m., so still...
Let’s go outside, play ping-pong.
AND YELL WHEN WE WIN!
Argue, drive away,
your girl’s dress stuck in the door.
With the girl attached.
Police were dispatched in response to a call saying a woman had been dragged down the street by a vehicle. The victim told police that she had been arguing with her boyfriend who accidentally shut her dress in his car door. As he drove away he dragged the woman approximately 100 feet before her dress tore.
On a street corner,
A man argues with himself
and loses -- or wins.
9:39 p.m. — A caller from State and Main streets reported a man arguing with himself.
He went break-dancing
With a cell in his pocket.
It made many calls.
If he’d been a girl
,
the street dancer with tattoos
would have scared no one.
Someone called from Redlands Street at 1 p.m. to report a tattooed man in a black tank top “twirling around in the street.”
No one’s saying how
the dog got loose or how its
head got painted pink
A large white dog with a pink-painted head was wandering around near Fish Road and Knitter Lane around 8 p.m. The dog was returned to its owners.
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